I have a kitty named Chatty who adopted me a couple of months ago.  I did not want a cat.  They shed and need attention and you have that litter box thing to deal with.  But a kitty I now have.  My so-called friends feed her on my porch, built her a warm box and I eventually spent $400.00 to take care of shots etc.  This last week I’ve received some difficult information I did not want to hear.  Everyone is telling me that Chatty is pregnant.  I keep petting her and telling she is not, but the shape of her tells me otherwise.  So, I went from not wanting a kitty to probably having lots of kittens.  For all my dear friends, keep an eye on your front porch because you might find yourself with a new kitten if Chatty really is going to be a mom.   

So how is it that we can give and receive difficult information with ease and without reluctance and/or fear?  Giving and receiving difficult information does not have to create a problem.  As long as you have prepared the situation with clearly defined outcomes, you should be in good shape. Most of the time delivering difficult information helps a situation, increases performance and provides a clarity that was not there before.   

There are 5 typical situations where information is difficult to deliver if the context isn't set well: 

• When trust is lacking
• Where outcomes and objectives are not clearly defined
• When there are sliding standards which indicate favoritism
• When information is not delivered in a timely way
• When the information has to do with the competence of the receiver of the information

I think the most important aspect of leading and managing your people and your organization is providing a format for creating high value relationships that automatically produce trust.  When trust is present, you have the ability to provide a natural setting for people to thrive.  When your people aren't thriving you also have the ability to deliver information that they need to grow and improve their performance. 

We have a great list of the top 10 red flags managers and leaders should consider and be aware of when delivering difficult information.  Go to http://www.NatalieManor.com/downloads/Top10RedFlagsforDDIS.pdf to download your copy. 

Think of your best relationship.  Is it your husband/wife, sister, co-worker?  Why does that relationship work even when things are not going well?  When a relationship is good, you have the ability to share information in a timely way that might not be the most positive and yet that person listens and usually thanks you for the information.  What is present is trust. 

We have trained thousands of leaders just like you in leadership and communication skills.  During our trainings do an exercise that looks to build a list of the top 10 characteristics of a high value relationship.  We have never had a list that did not include trust.  We all desire to trust and be trusted.

I mention 5 situations above that are situations where difficult information can be a problem to deliver.  There are actually infinite situations that could be difficult.  However, if you continually make the effort to create trust in your relationships and organization, you will be able to share information and deliver information that is both difficult and positive with equal ease. 

For those of you in the East TN area we will be offering "Delivering Difficult Information Successfully" as a workshop sponsored by the Bristol Chamber of Commerce Business and Industry Council on April 18, 2007 from 7:45 AM to 12:00 Noon.  Go to the calendar page at http://www.NatalieManor.com/calendar.html for information this event and to register. 

Chatty and I have developed a pretty terrific relationship.  She was a stray that came into a household pretty much unwelcomed.  We have done well.  Actually, she has taken over every flat spot in my home.  I like her and am learning to love her.  She is called Chatty because she talks all the time.  For those who know me well, it is pretty funny that I would get a noisy cat.  Chatty and I have created a trusting relationship even with our not-so-smooth beginning. 

And if she does have kittens, you will have a chance to come to TN and collect your noisy kitty. 

My best, 

Natalie 

P.S. A preview of coming attractions:  I will be starting a new women's coaching group in the near future.  A limited number of people will be invited. Watch for details.  Let me know if you want to spend 6 months with me coaching on a weekly basis, working on your outcomes and goals with a very powerful and influential group of women.  At the end of 6 months, we will spend 2.5 days at a fabulous spa as a culmination of our work – you will meet and make many new female friends.  I’ve been asked to do this group for 2 years, so here we go.  Send me a private email if you would like to be considered for the group.  We will be calling it The Roadmap to a Woman’s Extraordinary Life^(sm)